Adventures in Nasal Washing

About 3 weeks ago I came down with a nasty upper-respiratory infection. I had mucus coming out of me like nothing I'd ever experienced. Tissue after tissue, blow after blow. It just. Kept. Coming. So my aunt suggested I get a Neti-Pot. I'd heard good things about them before and my aunt is a nurse so I figured she'd know about these things.

The idea of using one of these is kind of scary. When I was a child, I had a rice incident. I was eating a bowl of teriyaki chicken in the mall food court when someone made me laugh and one grain of rice went up my nose and lodged somewhere in my sinuses. I can remember how that felt to this day and it still makes me shudder. So I'd never been comfortable with the idea of anything ever going up there. Ever again.

But my mucus was copious and my Kleenex supply short. I went to Walgreens and spent $15 on the NeilMed Neti-Pot, the only brand they seemed to have at my location. I was hoping for $15 I'd be getting a cute little ceramic teapot, so that I could irrigate my nostrils with some decorum. What I got was a little blue plastic watering can that probably cost about $0.07 to manufacture. It comes with 50 packets of pre-mixed saline powder. It's basically salt and baking soda, but it claims to be "pharmaceutical grade", and the instruction booklet (it's about 15 pages long) warns you of the dangers of using anything but NeilMed brand Sinus Wash packets. So, theoretically, at least I can use this 50 times without exploding my nasal cavity or something.


The instructions tell you to dilute one packet into 8oz of filtered water. Then, you tilt your head at a 45° angle, lean over the sink, stick the spout in one nostril and pour until the water comes out the other nostril. 8oz doesn't normally seem like a lot of fluid, until it's going up your nose.


I found this fairly difficult to do the first time as nothing was coming out. I eventually managed to shake things loose by flaring my nostrils; tilting my head slightly back, but not too far back or the water goes right down your throat; and slightly blowing out my nostrils until a long strand of saline and mucus ran out my nose. It was so long. I was disgusted and horrified, whining to my boyfriend about how horrible it was. Then he left the room because he was starting to get grossed out too. I'm not sure he will ever find me sexy again.


The first couple of times I Neti-Potted, the water came out in trickles and spurts, rather than the smooth stream depicted in the manual. Once you get the liquid to flow into your sinuses, the sensation is somewhat unpleasant. I haven't actually timed it yet, but the time it takes to drain this pot seems like an eternity. The instructions suggest you make a "KHA...KHA" sound while breathing through your mouth to keep the solution from running down your throat. I tried this and found it to be weird and unnecessary. It also freaked out my boyfriend even more.

I've been using my Neti-Pot for about two weeks now. The first time I used it, after I got all that nastiness out of my nose, I felt immediately better. I'd gone through nearly half a box of Kleenex that day, but only had to blow my nose about twice afterwards. The manual suggests you use their product twice a day, and I am totally not committed to that. I've been using it about every other day because it's just kind of a pain in the ass. So far I haven't noticed any miraculous changes in my breathing, as I still have a stuffy nose all the time. But I also went hiking last weekend, got my pants all yellow with pollen, and didn't need to take any allergy medication. Now that it's spring in Phoenix, I'll figure out in the next couple of months how well it holds up.